Submitted by The Boo Man on Tue, 05/14/2019 - 23:44

Attorney General William Barr was held in contempt of court for not appearing before congress after he appeared before congress. This must be the worst attempt at covering for a president since Sandy Berger was caught stuffing classified documents down his trousers. Everything with the Clintons ends up being about the contents of trousers. Portly Jerry Nads screwed the pooch with this strategy. These idiots who think they are more clever than the love child of Socrates and Stephen Hawking have yet to figure out you can't out-bastard a bastard and Trump has made a living out of being a bastard when the need arises. Trump was actually playing ball but Congressman Nads couldn't help himself and the President shut it down. Good. I'm all for full transparency but that is not what the democrats want. They want a show trial because they will never have a real one.

Meanwhile Amy Klochubar held a town hall meeting on the evil Fox news and said nothing for sixty minutes. Every time Trump's great economy was brought up she would refuse acknowledge how good it was and then explained she would fix the unbroken economy by taking on the pharmaceutical companies and infrastructure. I'm not sure if the pharmaceutical companies are supposed to pay for the infrastructure. She couldn't elaborate. I have not witnessed such word salad since Fat Albert threw Mushmouth down a spiral staircase whilst he was reading Shakespeare.

Eric Swalwell, he's fun. He looks like a LEGO piece and only has two arrows in his quiver. Russia and taking away everyone's guns. He's the first American politician to threaten to use nuclear weapons against Americans. And Trump is the dictator. He might be slightly more dense than Congresswoman Garbage Disposal. Like most people who think they are way smarter than they actually are he says things on twitter thinking he is breaking new ground in identity politics but ends up stepping on more rakes than a blind landscaper. "Do you know how many times the word "Woman" is mentioned in the Constitution?" typed the permanently sanctimonious LEGO man. " Zero. That is unacceptable. Women must be equally represented and equally protected. #ERANow"

 I think you all know how this panned out.

This Howard Dean mini-me thinks the NRA is afraid of him. The NRA exists to protect the second amendment. Eric Swalwell has never read the second amendment. Or the constitution.

Meanwhile back on the plantation Nancy Pelosi is having issues and I'm not talking about her face and gravity.Some people have cats to herd. Pelosi has cats with ADD and a hatred for America and Israel to herd. There are other cats too. The impeach Trump cats. lead by leatherface wearing a James Brown wig Maxine Waters. Seconded by that constantly constipated-looking Al Greene. And they are at a point where they are admitting the only way to prevent Trump from winning in 2020 is to impeach him. The rest of us have known that since election night. All this was expected. But it's nice of them to admit the democrat's running for president are less attractive than a lanced boil.

Next door we have Beto O'Rourke who...Oh, he's gone already. Back to Texas to eat dirt and ride his skateboard bought for him by his wife. Oh, Beto we hardly knew you but another pasty white weirdo has taken your place.

Pete Butsomething. Did you know he's gay? Of course you did. Everyone knows because he and the media mention it every five minutes. Gay is the new Obama. This sanctimonious douche bag really chafes my chaps. He's a fraud like the rest. He's trying to portray himself as some sort of moderate pragmatic John Kasich but he spent a month trashing Mike Pence who has never had a bad word to say about poofy Pete. Then he borrowed Obama's soapbox and decided he is the arbiter of who is and isn't a good Christian. Like most liberals he has no self awareness. This clueless grifter likes to sound moderate by saying God is not partisan and does not have a party affiliation. That's good but he blows it (pun intended) by following up with "if God did have a political affiliation, it wouldn’t be the one that sent the current president into the White House.” Well done, dumbass. You, your husband, your fake Christianity and your Leave it to Beaver haircut should stay in South Bend. We already have a John Kasich.
Meanwhile back on the plantation Adam Schiff still has evidence Trump colluded with Russia but, it's a secret. He's going to subpoena everyone in the country if needed. It must really suck knowing this is the height of your career. Lying to remove a president because your base tells you to. On the bright side (for him) he's not Eric Swalwell.

Meanwhile, back on the plantation the 2020 democrats are slowly coming to a consensus. Government healthcare, reparations, tax hikes on everyone, eliminating the electoral college, free college, universal basic income, open borders. free everything for everyone who enters the country while millions of actual Americans are homeless.

I could go on but I'm sure you get the point. This is what Trump is up against. It's a bouillabaisse of anti everything that makes this country great and if you don't like the taste of the bouillabaisse then you must be silenced and or killed to death via a very late term abortion. I'm not going to say the next election is the most important in our lives because quite frankly everyone says that every presidential election. And the more radical the agenda the less likely it will be implemented. However over the decades they have broken virtually every facet of America in order to remake in the name of government.
This is the most radical group of democrats we have ever had thankfully they are the most inept, socially awkward, weird, creepy, vain, vapid line-up ever. Trump should win and win bigly.