Submitted by The Boo Man on Wed, 09/25/2019 - 02:32

Quick! Someone put out an amber alert on Greta Thunberg! She's been kidnapped by A cult called "The Left". She's been brainwashed by said cult. Brainwashed to do the bidding of people who crave nothing but power. This is where we are, folks. Taking advantage of children. manipulating the young minds. The liberals have been doing it for decades in the colleges and to a degree in the primary schools. Now they are importing fresh meat. The saddest part about this is Greta Thunberg will grow up to be a narcissistic pantsuit with a terrible personality.

So, the planet is 12 years away from boiling over. What should we do? Everything! If you are a democrat running for the Oval office in 2020, ban meat, ban cars, limit how many children we have, ban planes. Ban plastic straws etc. Only, do it after the election because Getting elected is more important than saving the planet. Seriously! You can't expect them to go from one Midwest town they don't care about to another Midwest town they don't care about and eat their meat for free. They need their votes! And then they can go to hell!" There is nothing more awkward than a democrat at a state fair. Well. perhaps Cardinal Pete at a state fair.  He stands out like herpes in a monastery.

Greta Van Pantsuit demands we take the impending death of the universe seriously. I will. I will when democrats stop eating meat at state fairs. I will when they stop using private jets. I will when environmentalists stop blocking traffic causing evil cars to idle for hours in traffic emitting all that terrible exhaust. I will when these climate protestors leave the protest site as clean as it was when they arrived. I will when they grow and are willing to listen to the other side. The democrats pandering for the presidency pledge to rejoin the Paris accord. What is the Paris accord? It was an opportunity for world leaders to fly in their large planes to Paris where upon landing they were whisked away with their entourage (anyone who is someone has an entourage) in at least a dozen large, black, gas guzzling SUVs. Their final destination? An incredibly large Parisian hotel not powered by solar. Inside they eat meat. lots of meat and discus how the rest of us should not eat meat or have SUVs or fly.

Has anyone calculated Greta Van Pantsuits carbon footprint for her journey to the UN? Was her plane ride from Scandinavia carbon neutral? What about the UN? How do they keep the lights on?

The 2020 pack of pandering socialists want to lead the country and yet they fail to lead on the one issue they claim is our WWII or holocaust or something else incredibly dramatic that makes great late night television. The world is coming to an end in 12 years because of fossil fuels? Don't fly to Paris. Skype for f**ks sake. Bernie wants to control how many children we have and Andrew Yang wants to do away with private car ownership. That's a lot of sacrifice by us. What are they sacrificing? Nothing. Bernie has three houses yet he wants to regulate deodorant.

The democrats hate wealthy people. Anyone who succeeds is demonized by the left. For some strange reason they believe all millionaires and billionaires achieved their wealth through devious means. They want to punish these successful people by taking half their wealth. Sanders says billionaires should not exist. Fine. What has Sanders, Warren and the rest personally done for poor people? Nothing. What legislation have the authored that will help the poor and middle class? Nothing. These lecturing frauds go to the congress and do nothing. They run for president to fix the problems they could have fixed in the congress. You know, where the laws are made. Bernie goes on and on about things he never bothered to address while spending 25 years as a do nothing backbencher.

Our political "elites" need our problems because without those problems they wouldn't have any value or job. No party has taking advantage of this more than the democrats. And no party has pushed the climate change disaster more than the democrats. So, it's not surprising the sole answer to climate change is a complete surrendering of our freedoms to the government. A government led by democrats of course. They know what is best for us and only the democrats know how to save us from the fiery impending doom that awaits us. They will do whatever is necessary to save the planet except playing by the same rules they force us to play by.
Enjoy those steaks because they will be the last free ones you get to eat.

-Boo